time-oh;9.4pm

i dunnoe where did i last end??

k Friday i went chua chu kang to buy fishes and fish tank..thanks darshan for helping me carry my fish tank and choosing for me all the fishes..and trying to catch the fishes even though your hand was too short and was slow tht the fishes swam away..i had fun with him!

then went baq to wdls put in the fishes do my hair then rush down..vimz pick me up then drove to admiralty fetch navin anneh then went baq to chua chu kang pick up sarjeev then went over to shan house=D oh wait i had mac dinner=d

then after tht watch shit i forgot the movie name once agn..but its was a nice movie..
fell alseep..actually suppose to leave the house like 2am liek tht have supper then head home.
i fell asleep in his house..he also never wake me up..next day wake up i wondering where the fuck i am..i scared alr.hahahha..then had breakfast with shan ,dhinesh and darshan then he sent me home=))



saturday went to thiviya 21st birthday party..dress code was blue..i cudnt find anything so i got a turquoise...went to Clarke quay.wah the dj was jus perfect...the songs were all awesome..
so bro was in the mood for dancing..and when u see ur grp of frens we jus joined in la..
had fun...then went home ard 1plus..up there its me and pris=))

i didnt go out after thtt i was busy doin my room..for onam..
and damn alan's phone has been giving him so much problems..i cnt even fckin cntact him soo annoyed..

the today was sucha funny day
after school helped umz out with her art.actualli i did nth la..
jus waited for her to be done with..
seeing her being stressed aand praying hard for it to come out properli.
im lucky im no art student=D

KK then met chandini ...went to buy food
at883 went her house eat eat then watch hangover...damn funny ah the movie..
i think wht mke it funny was the ppl i was watching with..hahaha..chandini keep laughin laughing..i cnnt laugh alredi..laugh too much alredi la..
uma keep disturbing me say huh all..paiseh=p

whtelse..uhm...
went sinda last minute..anand talk to me nicely for the first time in my life.
then lesson ended..then neither bro nor parents came to fetch me home
so i walked back home with mahesh and anand..thanks for following me back to my block=))

khay now im super exhausted.resting at the moment..now the time is 10.30pm


today was sucha a funny swit day..thanks to the girlss

i smile wide when im with her

messy hair..in a rush to meet her

she camera shye laa

subway subway!

i had a rough day ..but i mde the best of it.
lets pretend to forget wht bad things happens in life and focus on good things in life..

smeone didnt come school today=) ass..

after school went we went to subway at republic poly like after so long i goin out with all my classmates..

tivya,saravanan,vineeth,ravin,sangeetha,calvin,zhen xing,diyannah,taufiq,nkita,faris,limin,myself.im relli sory if ur name isnt here..im not tht good in rmbeing who is present.khay we were like whackin food oni siah..haha..
and we feel up the whole subway...=DD.

Then went home..felt exhuasted so lay down on bed.fell asleep.
then uh...actually i wanted to go tekka with my mum..like spent sme time together.cuz i kinda have a heavy heart and usualli i speak it out with my mum but since i and mum had a great fight though we r in talkin terms we r not tht close as wht it was ..so slowly its building up but im hurt.but wht she did is not right no matter wht she says or who she is..oh boi i hate this tiopic
so she turn me down she told me she had work and wud be late and was relli tired.
smetime i wonder whther my mum cud be like a mind reader and understand tht i relli wanna talk to her and spent sme time together.damn i guess she isnt tht good?!

khay.not much work is done in room.well i knoe ive been relli lazy recently.and erm not even bothering to cope in studies for the horrible results ive achieve.
wht is up with me? am i like losing luck?
and oh my god.i read my horoscope today after hundred yrs and it said ..
sep 2nd ill have problems with my good frens.and ill have a hard time geting baq with them
to all my good frens..not tht i trust it so much but if suddenly on september 2 im become insane or got possesed jus tolerate my anger or sacarsm.cuz i cant afford to lose my love ones..cuz ive lose one alr.

khay moving on..so i felt relli low and wanted to go down sit down al alone listen to music and chill..and thats when ill say " good frens are jus there when u need em"
the correct time she called me.and i went to meet her.i waited for half an hour.then it was like 9.30pm by then was under her block listening to songs while i saw sme guys playing sepak takraw at the court..then i blindly followed where she brought me to..we sat there and had our never ending chats..i jus wanted smeone to listen and she was jus perfect..i bought her drinks cuz i appreciate her so much...i mean who wud jus leave whtver they do and come to meet me jus cuz i wanted sme attention and wanted to be heard..thanks dear one.=)))

kk..so came home like 11plus..man i feel so cold..i rmber those time when i felt soo cold and esh wud be sooo warm..yea thick skin la he even though he is soo skinny..pig la he..i rmber grabbing him so tight cuz he is relli like sme heater like tht.hahaha.khay.i miss u.and i knoe i cnnt find anyone else to hug =( aww..its khay.u r jus special and no one can replace u..be happy i love u more today..and thnx so much for evrything.and dun worry ill handle evrything cuz i knoe u are always beside me guidng me along ..jus not direct but indirect.i knoe u..khay i love u sayang.

Bored indeed.
So jux a random quiz abt maself.
took this from bavaniii!!


`Promise you wont lie?
: i can try..

`Do you get jealous easily?
:Yes..liek alot.

`How often do you wear makeup?
:when i go out to smewhere not woodlands


`Is there anithing hurting eu currently?
:yea..life is not simple yeah?


`Have eu kissed smeone recently?
:Yeaa..haha..last sundayay=))

`Whos bike did eu ride in last?
:never ride la but sit is venod..ride is kawasaki vicky one.

`Have eu been a angry,sad,happy person lately?
:DUH..i have feeling.imma human

`Have eu ever gone to a court?
:nopes.

`Would eu ever get a tattoo?
:nope.

`Do u think eu can love smeone without trusting them?
:trust is evrything!?

`How is yr heart right nw?
:haha abt to split for two.hahah kidding..
its jus full of questions.

`Can eu ever forget or forgive,if it really hurt you?
forgive yea..not forget=)

okhay this is my 200th post..

i knoe i knoe ppl will be wondering wht the hec didnt i mke it a big issue or get excited...
cuz im like realli not in the mood and like getting super lazy.im lossing my hpyperness if thats even a word.lols..

khay uh..
aravind omg this guy is realy freaky...he is like pottu vanguran...mke me say smth which i hide for very long.wah i feel like i have a hole in my mouth..f*ck.
k..moving on..


class has been super lame and tiring..

and i and mrs kumar was having long long chats like after so long.
i had so much to say ..and she was so glad to have tht conversation with me.lols.
i haven finish wht i wnted to tel her the 3/3 people came..say i wasting her time..dunnow wht..then i had to go.grrr..

khay..wht else..faris is relli bein sweet to me recently.had so much to tell him


and wht annoyes me currently is affections..
cuz thats wht is gonna put me in trouble...
mkin me lose conscentration...

oh speaking of which.
vimal chari is nt sick.jus cough..lols.
im jus filling up space in blog.


umaa.hope u r annoyed tht i write abt lau in my blog.hehehehehehehehe
kk best thing of all this.u knoe i love u.khay u better knoe tht..

k and.girl u can relli act ur way out
i fal but i dun fall again=)
nt tht im smart i jus knoe u.
and dunch worry ill pretend to nt feel any hurt
jus to be the dumb stupid idiot ..


whtelse ah...
isit he who looks cuter by the day.
or isit me who is unable to find a flaw in him=)


and bavani damn cute siah.wanna mke blog but lazy
wanna put picure but dunwan..funny la she.
miss her so much..love u switharthttp://treasured-love-91.blogspot.com/
she wrote ant me sooo sweeet=))

time-check:9.01pm


kk
had to catch uppppp like thousand yrs thing with preethika..
cnnt rmber whtelse happen?


ouhhh..new lauu...hahahahhahahahha
uma isnt happy abt it..i knoe!hahaha
andandand get well soon vimal charii!<3


kk..

went to watch the proposal today..with chandini vidette uma umy=)
at 5pm soo i knew aswini and preethi wudnt be able to come..
k anyways...the movie was like realli darn funny la..hahahaha...
then went to eat left ard 8.send evryone then me and umz walk home..
chats wit her send her home then walk home..saw aravind(fuchun sec)
talk with him awhile..then walk home stupid hafiz also shouting sae h1n1 ..idiot he..

kk i frustrated cuz im getting weekly allowance not monthly..
so annoying i gotta safe my money ..and spend effing wisely

and umz and my crazy idea to come over my house to mke smth for recess=)
HAHAHHA..

KK wahtelse...so much mre work to be done for my room oh my god

and syg,im so sorry i made u finish ur prepaid.
but boi i appreciate it alot.ill try to top up fer yuew..
butbut preethika ask me to safe for myself first.awww.

feeling realli tired..
i have to get certain things done before i crash to bed..

whtelse...
attitude got attitude..=p

time is 11.24pm

currently waiting for naven anneh and deep to stop studying..oh plus this guy name sarjeev too
bro said he wud brin me along to eat mac later at 1.so letss see whther i cud stay up and then tom wak up at 8 plus to get goin to ikea..
p.s im looking forward to how my room is gonna look like once its done.

and thankew bavani for the love and support.
and its soo weird like people are stalkin me when im with uma

cuz evryone is using this phrase now to me "hey orae loves ah" but jus in a different meaning.
...


i realli dunnoe where this alan has been.haven heard from him
no messages no calls?
so not how it used to be..oh boi i jus wish evrything is ok..
its jus awkward when he doesnt msg me ..cuz when he calls or msg i knoe he still in one piece
like now..i dunnoe why he hasnt call me or replying me..busy?pre paid low?
but he always finds a way to call atleast..
miss him.=)

lik i said.people chge.i dunnoe i dun feel the same.
if u r wht u say u r ..then let it be..
evrybody is pleased. and u wanna know-oh0h.

and the lights are on this night.
its gonna be different and i knoe where its goin but i dunno which side its headin



and its gonna be my 200th in two post.i dunno wht to do ..but i wanna do smth special..
ill think abt it and tell =d...

time:10.35pm


the love i get from with these wonderful people(from the picture)
jus no words..the most amzing people on earth.
he is my dad and she is my mum..
dun mistake me..
they are not my reall parents..
they are eshu parents..
i was always treated lika daughter in their house..
specially my loving daddy...always giving me his love..the sweet things he say..
im realli gifted to know them.thanks esh.
missing them so much..
my dear dad loves me so much ..i love him so much.
he has always been there giving me moral support
and the oni one who knows how much i love my esh anneh...
thanks so much..and esh anneh trust me when i see them i still see the hurt the loss of smeone special to them..u..they miss u so much..i love u


and indrani is like sme relli super sweetboi.
he was like randomly saying
"prass i love u"
haha..when actualli that was the perfect thing i wanted to hear at tht moment,


and more then u appreciate my care and concern
my previous likings appreciates it more.
seriosli...i think he appreciates me mre then u do..
he told me the cap i bought for u was realli sweet and great.
i was more then happy to hear tht.
he was sweeter then u.appreciated me mre.and smiles at me whenever he sees me.
u see how people gives attention to me then wht u do..


and seriously u mke me learn so much in life.
wait maybe this is needed.
im sorry if i have hurt u or said anything to u
im sorry i have loved u mre then im suppose to.
im sorry i gave u the most attention.
im sorry to hide all my sadness cuz i want u to be happy.
im sorry to call u names
im sorry i showed too much love.
im sorry i gave u firs pirority
im sorry i get sooo angry when smeone hurts ur feelings.
im sorry to have the feeling to protect u like my own sister.
im sorry i loved u too much.
im really sorry.
cuz i went over my limit to love u too much
i fogot tht after all u r not my reall sister
if oni u rmbered wht u told me two yrs back.
i think i jus have to backoff.let u off.


oh man.my heart feels this sharp pain which is realli hurting me.
i dunnoe wht to say.
do i regret wht i have done
lesson learn.never love anyone too much cuz the world u r in now..people are jus selfish.
when they jus dun feel it they'll jus push u down and laugh at ur fall.

smetiimes..its best keeping things to urself.cuz none jus understand how u relli feel and the fact it evryone cares for themselves first before anyone else.so when u have a problem jus seriously dun head to anyone.face it urself.its wht which mkes u a better person...not depending on smonee.

and evryone around me i jus turning into smeone they are not,
i feel so scared.im jus not used to it.
i love the innocence.
not gangsterism,rowdiness and smth which i dun wanna see in u.

time-check:8.17pm

k ermm


wht ah?
nth much to sae..



suprised to see bruno outside.
i think thts it.


is either im fading or im transparent?
i dunno.i dunn wanna mention name not cuz i dun wann u to knoe
i jus dun wanna tell people its u and not let others think u r mean or wht.
this has been like tht since last week..well today was jus perfect where it was any escappes
it was obvious.i cud jus see it.maybe u jus dun wish to talk..i dunno,and im not angry at all..
i jus feel very hurt.i jus dunno whther i deserve the hurt.its k.i stil love u.not expecting in return.



k anyways..there is the hopeless person
i wonder whther this hopeless jus see tht i care for u so much
i was there wehn ur bloody ex busted u.when u were angry i was there.
when smeeone left ur permenantly i was there.
when u needed to talk i was there,..when now happened.. i am there.
and u knoe ill always be there..then god damn are u blind tht i care..
or u jus tking me for granted..





cnnt wait to do my room!!!woooo

k feelin tired..

physics was ok thanks to umz o'level book ..

k last night cudnt sleep properli.
so much not one..
like wht is my future plan and all the crap.i felt stupid.

kk..
er nth much for today.

oni bad news today
well he jus cudnt keep his eyes mouth hands legs to himself.
for him nth la..ppl surrounding him oni has to worry.
bloody fuckers no balls siah two ppl whack one guy.
k whateva..anyways hope he recovers soon...<3


wokay..went home rest then later on met umz chan umy at mac.
then went marsling follow umy and umz threading..
i didnt do cuz i wanna do next week..


so tired.i cant wait to do my room lahs..

chatting with my bruno dunstan mathews miranda!
hahaha.so much to catch up with..
thanks for evrything.
and dun wry alright...there wud be smeone else better then her for u!
loves....see ya reall soon..remember dinner plans!

i found the picture relli cute.haha.

time-oh:9.20pm

sunday i like jus laze home.didnt go granny place.didnt feel like it
k then my dear good fren callled me to walk out..went dinner with her,
went to sme block slack slack..then wanted to go vista park ..since it started to rain i jus got wet in the rain..really drenched la.seriously walking in the rain is wht i needed to make my heart smile..and guess i felt loved by esh..though i know he is sooo mad tht i got wet in the rain..
speaking of tht.i do wht i wann do ..noone says anything like..it used to be esh was the oni one who always make shure i eat time to time..mke shure i dun fall sick.mke shure noone hurts me.mke shure then my life when perfectt.and scolds me when i do the silly things.oh dear i always took him for granted.i always thought whye does he have to nag at me so much..even my own brother or mum wudnt say anythign when i get wet in the rain and dun eat for two days?and i always lied to him i wasnt sick cuz when i start sneezing he wud start his music.i used to think he was soo possesive.man when i get wet in the rain now or fall sick i always miss the love he had for me.and i wonder how wud he be screaming his head off if he knew i had h1n1 and i have been reli rude to evryone and have been goin out and not saying a word to anyone.and doin certain which is better not to be mentioned..and the thing which he hates..me sleeping in class and droping in grades..im sorry esh i knoe u r so mad at me..but u knoe whye i am like tht right..i loved to be myself.but when i return back i jus CNNT be myself not tht i dun want to..

kk esh...im relli sorry ..i mke shure i do well for my end of the year.im relli sorry for my common test.i wasnt interested at all..im scared...hiax...too much for me esh jus tooo much..

kkk....
i feel so likee an idiot...careless la prass..i dunnoe where the hec is my earpiece
fuck la...i dunno whther i lend it to smeone..


and the wow man these days the sky has been really amazing..the orange u see in the evening is really amazing and the baby blue u see is sooo mind relaxing.and man u shud have seen the crystal clear sky jus now..awesome la..k im not mad..its really beautiful=D

today umz came over to look at roomy and decide wht had leave whts needs to be and trust me this woman is amazing..hahaa she got a whole lot of ideas and her head!! then went to umz house to actualli watch minnale well i was cheated..it was sme other stupid dubt movie..=X! WE watch game plan with umy in umzy house...after tht umy had to leave...saw subra karthick and arvind down..cudnt see them properli though.then watch another half of a movie a confusin one which uma wud explain to me tom=p..

kk tom is physics,i dun relli care but ill care=d

i wonder i cud care any mre then this..
i wonder wht wud it be if i stop msgin u..wud u jus be happy then u have one mre less idiot who wud stop talkin to u?wud u even carE?wud it affect u? i dun think so.liek whye the fuck shud i care..i wanna liek fuckin ignore u.im so frustrated with ur attitude.boi u mke me so angry.
i sound lika kid when i tell u i love yuew? well ATLEAST A KID CAN UNDERSTAND IT u r jus being a bitch.fuck u.seriousli.man whye shud i care when u dun cre.>i say all this but ill be back to caring for u loviing for u worryinf for u in a couple of days.i dunoe where to hit my head?


u knoe smetime i try to stay real positive all the way.i smile i laugh i talk i shout.but end of the day.when night falls.when im all alone.i hate this part.i think.when i think ..i think too much.when tears feels eyes it doesent stop there does it? get readi a towel to dry up my pillow.and wakin up back to a normal sticker smile.wow life is great.wahahaha.i dun think lieing is a big sin now..
all day i lie so the ppl ard m dun feel negativity and have a happy life..


i experimented it.and it worked jus the way i predicted.
when i dun smile.u dun give a shit.u wait for me to mke a move.
i move away u still dun give a fuck.cuz im a fuckin nth to u.rubbish bin in another word..
fuck.i fucking dun give a damn u knoe whye.u have hurt me before.i have waken up from then.once bitten twice shy.i learn my lesson.dun worry ill keep silent when u speak i give a return.but not returning any love for ur fake love.

LIFE IS ACTUALLY is BEAUTIFUL U JUS SHUD KNOE HOW TO LIVE IT.

time-check:5.12

k have been relli occupied and i like it this way=D
like friday where did i go?

oh as wht i shud have been doin wa to follow her to braces appointment
but i guess she had different thing in mind.priya's place then aswini followed her if im not mistaken.
and preethika cme one u shud knoe tht i still wudnt have studied if i didnt follow u.

k after school went with umz and chan to meet umy ka
then went to lunch while we laugh at the stupidest things..thanks to chandini la.haha..
then chat with kumz and sara under sme block
then walk around went to umz house catch a movie with them all.left when chan left cuz i had plans later tht night..went home watch t.v then doze off..suppose to meet my fren then from there leave to chua chu kang..but i slept so mmy bro had to wake me up then went to shower change cancel plan too meet fren..bro and i went to chua chu kang..no waait we went to admiralty

..went to mac then chat chat after tht meet my cousin brothere and then went to chua chu kang
oh plus one mre guy whom i dunnoe who is he but his name is sarjeev or sanjive i dunnoe
navin anna fren..ya he those nice nice type..lol..k then navin anneh followed

me to go get double chocolate from
mc cafe..the person was jus tkin very long to do it
..and my bro was getting impatient.haha funny siah..my cousin bro was telling in tamil he gonna burn chua chu kang macdonald la wanna throw plate at the woman face la..stupid la.hahhaa..
then bused to uncle's house...
dinesh my cute lile babyboi! he so damn cute cme to the door then hug me ..he was like the happiest boi to see me.lol.then disturb all the small children over there..watch a movie "stepmother" sweet movie=D
then talk talk talk run here and there like a lifeless small kid.lol how else im suppose to be with primary sch kids ard me.then left at 2.30am from his house left for mac with brother buy back
went home to eat then slept..

next day woke up plan with uma to go ikea to check out things for my room..
met her at 12.3opm under my block..he was having his sisters jacket lols..kk(inside joke)
k..then met umy ka at cwp..mrt ourselve to tampines.lol a very very very longggg journey!!
we were all like so hungry laa//went there ate..

ggreat saturdayyy

then took shuttle service bus.
u knoe near ikae there other shopping centre like the giant and courts.
so we got down at giant thinking tht the bus wuddnt go to ikeaa..but it does..haha stupid
then walk there..went there felt lazy ..go in alr umy find a fluffy carpet get excited hahaha
then walk ..saw manny things..umzy have so much ideas and like so creative..haha i dunnoe wht wud i be doin if she wasnt with me at ikea..then tke pictures.then laugh and laugh when we saw stupid things ..we were walking and walking realli exhuasting ..found a pink sofa sat down there look at the book saw whts in it..wht wud be nice and planning evrything.
then when we wanna leave from there,,umzy funny siall..there was two exits..one is nearer the other was further..the further was the exit.the nearer was the enterance both also can go out right..uma started walking the further route..i told her it wass futher she stil went tht side thinkin of the other direction ..haha then went the other way..
saw some star light..them umy said " eh uma starfish" lmao
hahaha..funny siah..laugh like mad..hahaha..umy laugh very lloud.hahahahhaa..funny siah
then took this shuttle service bus which leaded to pasir ris..jus a stop furthur for tht i was scolded..haha..then uma and umzy went to woodlands...while i got down at bishan..
went for some birthday party.was super shagged..but i was jus enjoying myself la.ahaha..then went home around 12 i think doze off alr.

time-check:10.08pm

always look on the bright side of life..tadadadada.

haha..wokay.

haha lets jus say when i look at life in a positive way ill jus sae life is beautiful
i jus keep telling myself. "this is nth for u.u shure can deal it"

the only thing abt a problem is dun get focus on it.
seriously.jus tke life real easy.and go with the flow.
and i think thats wht is giving me the right mind to tke all the "not nice things" in world

i have been really doin alot of rephrasing in the words i speak.
positive mind eh..lols.im jus goin to try almost anything to keep myself with brightness then lights off.kk



oh wait.i cnnt believe i didnt write about my great dinner with my brothers tht night,.
i cant rmber wht date but it was last week.
so mum didnt cook so called my bro to meet me after he went to play pool at yishun.
so pig made me wait for 20 mins..so i was oni expecting him to turn up cuz he told me tht he onli coming..lan was telling me he went to play pool..and man i miss him so much.its been relli long since i saw him..cuz evrytime we wanna meet we both have plans.or he have smth on.
then i saw my bro walking with a grp of people i was like.grr my bro is an ass.
so lan syg,mahes anna,john anneh i cnnt rmber who else..
so we makan makan..then i order fried rice.khay it wasnt my fault khay it was jus tht the person put alot of rice..so john anneh scold me to eat smemore..then alan pig like side for him
say i oni eat 4 mouth. then john anneh force and feed me..aiyoo he ah...
then went to the hall near ban's block to slack slack then talk to lan after so long.i miss him.
haha for the 100th time.i knoe.=p then left homie...
and lan wishes i was his own sister.it doesent mke any difference cuz i treat him like my own now.=) sweetest boi=D

khay.subtracting ignoring deleting all negativeness..
man i see so much of love..

today after school went subway wit tivya.chats with her at republic poly.
man others can be a total bitch la.dun wry time will heal=)

k wht else ah..

owh yst evening smth embarassing happen.
i accidently msg mahesh anneh abt school life..i was suppose to msg my own fren mahesh abt it!
wah then he start calling me.haha.yes and i dun wan pick up i scared..hahaha.
the oni person im afraid of is he.even though he is relli relli sweet,gentle,soft spoken and really nice to me la..so scary to see him when he was angry tht time..kk shh
then i msg him say sorry al...he said nvm ma its ok.for this all dunneed say sorry ..haha
i was like banging my head la..how dumb...quickly wanted to tell smeone..so i tell lan
pig head call me cute and started laughing and told my bro..

kk my bro wanna use comp
mke it quick

after republic poly walk baq schhool cuz kumares needed company to study
so i studied with him.no wait i taught him math.and kumares congrats on ur english exam!
he did very well.gd job !! haha..


went home chge did alot of work then 7plus met my darling,
went to 888 to eat.i had tons to ttalk to her,time flies so fast la.there is no words to describe how much i missed her.thanks so much for evrything darling.ur love is wht i wanted and i have alot of it.love u

whye do i love her?cuz she is there when i need smeone
she knows even though i smile so wide its a big fat fake smile.
she knows the min i talk differently.thankew so much for the concern.

im loved.thats wht i wanted.
ha yes darling i wil smile jus for u=D
ANYTHING FOR YOU..


i realli think u r useless..hopeless.
im like giving up in making efforts.
why do i still think of yuuew?
stupip bitch

k eshu.i love u.must i always say tht?u knoe right
then mus tell u ah!idiot la u.i miss u la.can u like dn show me u got attitude problem stay beside me.stubbon ass.i u still knoe i love u right? evvryone knows i do.wht abt u?u bettter know.


purple jus for me.jus to comfort me


stalkstalkstalk

if u were smart and u knew me welll and wanted to knoe abt me and wht happen
u wud had find ways to read my blog.which was written in black on purpose.

time-check:7.26pm


k i started of in the morning leaving earli for i wanted to get freed from hell.lols
went to school wit sucha a heavy heart.lookin for one to speak to jus to feel abit better in a way or two.music wasnt helping it jus made me feel more down and this ache in the heart which is really hurting.kkkkhaaayy....haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiisssssssssss...
k

then meeting people like jonathan and sing siang in the morning jus started to mke me nt think of anything.then talkin abt virginity in class..class boys are jus insane.cant believe sme or not virgins ah..haha..fuck la.i feel this "eeeewww" feeling.hahaha..wadeva lahs.

then recess.preethika was having her "prass had never seen peethika's face like this before" stomach cramps...which was jus makin me like so out of words.i didnt knoe how to react when i saw her face soo like one kind la...lol..i felt the shivers on me.hope she feels better now..
so priya wanted to sit with me during recess so i and her was sitting her.
then kumares from behind give me a shock.lols.haha.was talkin to him..stupid la he.keep remind abt assholes whom i wanna forget liek realli soon.

so yea.then ravin they all were talkin to me abt baron la chivas la..wtf la.haha.
planing to go shisha dunnoe yet..tom goin swensense with tivya they all.=D

and i was invited to go over to chua chu kang.the things i dun wanna do and see are the things which is inviting me over.whts the goddamn problem.

k then anand wanted to meet me.so i went to 888 with him after so long ii met him
then john anneh also came along..chat chat..stupid anand paid for my chicken rice..
then wht uh...oh then went to hall to slack awhile.lol.thiru all exploring the lorry haahaha
so krithiga from far didnt approach anyone..chats with john anna they all.
jus felt like not thinkin of anything and jus goin wit the flow.easy to say it ehs?

i see evryone having problems right now.
but once i step into school i jus leave things behind and have this big smile.
and evryone falls for it .and i got four people asking me this



"wah prass ur life really shiok ah.no problems ..u always smile smile jump here jump there one ah!"

" eh wah i wish there was a way where i cud exchange life with urs."

"i got so much of problems in life.u wont knoe all this.cuz ur life perfect wht"

i dunno whether to feel proud of my life or feel sad abt it.
those who tell me tht u got problems..i fuckin find ur problems relli darn childish la.
like this person dun talk to and all those shit la.
and my life seems simple.try to leave it and i can bet u cud handle it like me.
though i cannot handle it i still try my best to deal with it.
i'm not coward to run..smetimes i jus feel so low yes time where u wannna end ur lives.
but this is not it.


and silence is hurting me so much.i rather have u scolding me then staying silent
oh man.my head spins.this hurt is so unbearable.all i look forward now is ur smiles and words
and all i need is ur love and sme attention..


and thank you darling for those words. .i really miss u so much.i feel smth is missing when i dun see u for very long.


k.erm msn-ing now
common test is wht i am abt to flop.
end of the yr is where i need to show it all.
i need to concentrate.
i need to do wht is suppose to done

the reason why i liked u was because.
when i had a slightest headache u go mad.i worry so much
when it rains u tell me to get into shelters.
when i tell u i was abt to get knock down by a car u scolded me and wanted to hit me
when i fell sick u msged mme 24/7 jus to mke shure i was alright
when i was down.u were ready to break the person's face who made me upset.
u msged me like evryday .u called me to talk
noww..oh gosh.im tired of waiting for u to return to wht u was.
im leaving this place and moving forward
cuz i got so much pprblem and i wanted u to be beside me.u r not even close.
leave me alone.i wanna get over

il jus wannaa say this before i start saying anything

my blog gonna sound hectic.so seriously those who cant be bothered or like hates me or fuckin think that i use alot of vulgurs..then jus dun read this post..

i wonder how to put it in a nice way
ill try to use least vulgor as possible aite..


i jus dun get it...when i didnt had anyone..when she talked abt ur son.u turn ur back on the "twin bitches" and look forward to my smeone special..my smeone special treated u nicely..u and her got very close.u both talked abt the "twin biches" .she sides for my smeone spsecial when bitches was against her.it went well for one yr to two. and suddenly this motherfuckin slut backstab my someone special right in the back.how much of a fuckin bitch can u be.sucha a fuckin whore.
i wonder which fcukin world did u come from.i wonder whther u were fucked out the wrong way
ive never seen such a motherfuckin slut in my whole life.. i see my smeone special bleed in pain helpless. i feel disguste related to u.i rather hang myself to death then to call u with initials.
i feel embarass to call ur name.im ashame to live a life with u.
that guy is another one mre..a son of a bitch.
i dun get it.i swear this is the first time in my life i feel that i have problems in my life.
i always cud handle it.right now im jus helpless cuz it concerns me indirrectly and i cant help!

one thing i wanna tell.
i support those who i love.i listen to those who i love.
ill stand by his/her side till my last blood.i fight for my rights.and fuckin am not scared of death or when u threaten.im afraid of love.
the things i do for loved ones.

i swear ill go to any extend for my smeone special.
and this point in life i really dun wanna handle those stupid problems in school like
she not talkin to me or u wanna show me face..thats fuckin childish .i have problems to handle.
and dun piss me when im in school.i dun wanna talk abt this to anyone.unless i tell it to u other then it jus live ur life.

the things i go thru is jus fuckin unbearable.
it jus hurts me so much in the inside.

this isnt the end i knoe.this is jus the start for shure.im redy for this battle.
lose or win i fight with wht i have.
and when i return baq.i knoe its gonna be changes in me.

all i need now is some attention and love to keep me goin and win this battle.

i fuckin wanna stop crying and move forward till the end.

this are the time when i really wish esh was sitting right beside me.
and wanting all ur love.i ask for things i cnnt get.but i wish for it.

i wonder whye woman and ladies gossip.i really wish those who gossip rot in hell or get hit by an accident.i dun wish u well. god is fuckin watching upon u.he stays silent

u see my point of view is always different then the rest.
the way i convey it might be wrong.but wht i say is right and wht i say always happens.
cuz i can predict it

the twin bitches are jus gonna backstab u when yrs goes by.i wonder where u wanna put ur face late then.


wht i write is for me to release a amt of stress.it doesnt help much but it did a little
dun hurt my anymre.cuz im goin through jus alot in life right now
dun break me down cuz im about to fall from a great hight
and when i say fall i meant death is wht i see in future..
i dun see anything more or beyond

let me write in the good parts of life then later ill write the worst part of it..


so my holidays.i wudnt say i enojyed myself.though i tried to

national day celebrations in school was not bad after all=)
went home showered then left causeway to meet rubah ..went to buy lunch then walkk around.
left for home watched a movie ...

then around 8 plus got ready..left house at 8.45.
went to watch g.i joe at yishun .sadli niven didnt turn up he had smth on.
k movie started at 9.20..it was nice la..i wundt say its screwed or wht..i enjoyed it.
then went sembawang to gave supper..
thts wheere evrthing started.k lets skip it.

k then saturday was cleaning my room like mad woman=p/finnaly manage to clean my desk
and my room look neat.haha see elan my room is neat k!!

k then sunday went bishan park with relatives cycling was much fun ...soccer was wht i needed after long..haha.k violent la my family..i got scratched on my thumb and my upper arm...
and a blueblack mark on my left arm.lols.

k from there.we went to orchid country club to bowl.
had great time bowling..went to dine at granmother place then baq home..

well swallowing so much of the hurt this is the enjoying part of the weekend

time-oh:5.14pm

im sorry ..ive been out of my mind for this whole week.goin cra-eh-zy

thats why i really dun wanna say much so tht i dun deliver a wrong msg to anyone.

lips sealed for good reasons.

lately tivya and i have been getting to knoe each other well.haha full of crap man she.


sorry umz its not tht i dun wanna tell anything.i jus dun wanna say it then regret wht i say later on.and screw thing up and mke things worst?no i dun wanna do anything but to lay low.
so im sorry fer tht.and lately u also like smth wrong like tht.tke cre..
hope we get out of this silence soon.love u darling.

little gossips is never the right thing.i mean cme on .its not even a percent true.
lol.but wait whts the point of getting angry over it .i rather learn wht type of person she is and maintain my distance ehs..

im still craving chocolates big time.sme will go "isnt it normal for u to go crazy over chocolates"
actually not really.i love em but i dun usually crave alot la.suddenly i jus feel like having breakfast lunch and dinner of chocolates.haha.mad woman luhs..

and i told him i wanna stop this vulgarites..and he said we'll see.
?

k.i jus needa a break from all my friends.lookin forward to my weekends..
havving another wonderful outing with my big family once again!man i relli cnnt wait.
i jus wanna forget evrything and enojoy my friday night and saturday night with the great ppl=)
yea..i got bowling,badminton,soccer and two movie to catch in two days.im gonna jus keep myself real occupied.jus a little break formyself.

im starting to lose interest in studies.tell me whye?
i really need to get baq in track wit studies..

have been doin some proposal writting for my unit hike.yeah im planning it all with help of xin yi.got loadz of admin things to do.man thats alot of work to be done before the actual day.
hope it goess well=)



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

yesterday had movies at my house.ok la not bad la.
but we still wonder whther they got the jokes?
haha.i was tired though..but ok la.not too bad.

then was call to go for dinner my my pighead fren.went to dine with her at macs..i didnt eat cuz stupid posb machine no cash inside.fuck.soonihad 2 dollar plus cash in hand so i bought for bro dinner..lol bro then felt guilty i haven eaten anything yet..his friend venod bought chicken rice for me.haha thanks.

ill blog in the evening if i got the time.im abt to fal asleep.feeling very tired..



oh and after long i was on the phone wit anand jus not.
wait tis anand is 19 ..so fcking dun tink im writting abt smeone else

thankew bavani for so much of love.

thanks uncle also for the love.

thanks lan sayang yes u have always been loved by me too=)

thanks esh for evrything.i love u

time-oh:9.33pm

right now the oni person i wanna turn to is my rubah!!
she is like so smart la..she knew wht exactly i feel la..
thankew sayang for talking on e phone wit me though u were in class=)
appreciated alot


right now i wud like to tell u tht.i dun depend on you.i live my own live and without u i still can run the show.i think ive showed u this morning.i feel so iritated knnowing ive spend half of my secondary school life wit u..i kinda feel it was sucha a waste of time trying to mke u feel better and stuff.well rite now i see wht u r.putting this image out the innocent side of u oni works for awhile

wah..i shud relli stop sayin things la.jus stay out of this drama world
im not drama mama..im not facin this world wit u in it.

lols..i wanted to wear white for national day..i think im changing my mind to go for red.


lan pig slept the whole day and didnt come to see me.
currenty fighting wit him online..haha..dun worry..nahs..he knows i still love him..ahha
im gonna run away from my house and not meet u when u wanna mmeet me..miss u khay!

kk...this is so dumb.but i forget how indrani voice is like..!!haahaha


kk im not ready for anything.nth new for now please.exams is wht i need to concentrate on fer now

u were in school yet i didnt see u .wah sot.


kk i jus feel like spilling ur name out..but im jus controlling myself.
cuz i dun wanna regret wht i write ..

wah.feel like scolding u ..sucha slut la u...



fucking angry la..chi bai.i reallu feel like slapping u la.
whye r u being sucha a slut la..wah fuck la.fucking dun show me ur fuckin attitude

sorry for vulgarities

rubah loosu is on the phone nowww..!1

time-check:9.53pm

currently having mood-swings..bad ones..


i keep thinking wht ive done is wrong.eh i dnnoee la ..

kk currently i hve not been studying ..i really need a motivator.to get be tp study..
its always the end of the year where i start to slack and go back to basics..and yes i hate tht too..dont you?

once again mr. famous for not coming to school didnt turn up.asshole.

alan promised to meet me by wednesday..let seee

lols after recess funny la chandru reaction..

prass:*talking to kumares* abt changes in dates for movie
*suhan interupts*
suhan:oi! who all coming ah.when isit?ah.confirm alr ah?
prass:wait wait letme settle this first.might be changing dates cuz sme cnnt come.
suhan:who ah who?
prass.aswini! *aswini walks pass*
suhan:ah? so *ass hole pretends to not care*
haha u shud have seen his face when i talk abt her whn she walk pass lols..

kk after then in class al ook..

erm went home had lunch..showered..alan called i ask alan to call baq in five mintues.
pig head never call baq..i mssg him he say he ccalled for fun..haha nonsense!

took a nap..cuz i was jus really tired and sleepy.
yes for the next five to six days im gonna feel realy sleepy
lols.k nth interesting happens in life nowadays.

im starting to regret alot.sot